Saturday, November 29, 2008

Just another rant....

Recently, our next door neighbour passed away. This neighbour also happened to be my sister's father- in-law. As with Muslim and Malay culture, seven nights of tahlil would follow. Because tahlils were not planned in advance, like what people normally do with weddings, everything, from food to clearing up and washing up after the tahlil, were done by the family and relatives. Or, at least that what should happen. 

However, during the seven nights of tahlil, I was annoyed that none of the closer relatives helped out with the washing. Every night the same group of people was left to do the washing up, while the others, including the children, children-in-law and grandchildren of our neighbour, went upstairs and did God knows what. The same group that did the washing up consisted of my sisters, my nieces and the two maids that our neighbour had. There were times when I could not just stand around and had to roll my sleeves up and helped out. I was made even more annoyed when some from my neighbour's family would look from upstairs and watched us doing the dishes. Didn't they have any shame letting other people doing that? The tahlil functions were theirs to do and we were just helping but it would be nice if they joined us and helped out with the dishes. 

I was brought up in a family where we do things together. Whenever we had a function at home, all the preparations, clearing up and washing up were done together. I would be embarrased to leave people doing things for us. If we see anyone, be it siblings, nieces or nephews, not helping out, we would tell them off and ask them to help. I was glad to see this important life lesson was taught to us by our parents. But sadly, it is one many families seem to be missing.

Ringan sama dijinjing, berat sama dipikul......


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